Have you just gone through a break up and your ex boyfriend said "he wants more space?" It seemed like the perfect relationship; you know...the blissful one that was made in heaven. Then "boom" your boyfriend tells you that he needs more space and breaks up. His cold feet could have been brought on by a commitment issue, family problems or insecurity about the relationship. Here are tips to help you "get your ex boyfriend back" when he feels he needs more space.
- If you still love him and want him back, you must have a plan to get him back but with dignity. You must play a little hard to get at first to make your ex boyfriend want to chase you. This will make him remember what he lost and want to talk or be around you more.
The old adage "you want what you cannot have" will hold true here.
- Even though he broke up with you, he may still have feelings for you. Limit your communications and do not constantly email, text or call him. If you do communicate with your ex boyfriend, cut out the drama. He will not want to be around you if you are clingy, needy, whiney, or the drama queen especially if he has told you that he needs more space. Casual and infrequent communications will keep the contact established.
- When communications do start back, casually remind him of some of the good and fun times that the two of you had. Reminisce about events that you two shared, focusing on the things that he liked to do most. At all costs, do not bring up bad experiences or stressful situations from the past. This will only drive him farther away. Remind yourself "out with the bad, in with the good."
- If your ex boyfriend does not respond positively to your slow and subtle advances, then it may be time to back off. If he is not showing any interest, then either he is no longer interested in you or he really does need some time and space. If this is the case, then "give him his space." Time can heal and bring a relationship back together, so go slow.
- If he does seem to be getting interested in you again, then slowly warm up the relationship. Make sure to stay away from the issues that caused the break up to begin with such as clinging, stifling or checking up on him too much. You want the relationship to be a slow burning white-hot fire and not a flame and burn. You want to get him back and keep him this time.
- When your ex boyfriend does warm up to you and gives you the right signals, you can open your heart to him some. Tell him how you feel about him and the relationship without sounding desperate or needy. If he seems to be going in the opposite direction, then it would be smart to slow down, step back and let nature takes its course.
These are the first steps to take to get your ex boyfriend back. The next steps will seal the deal.
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